Ugh…I’m Feeling!!

Here’s the problem with that…when we avoid our feelings they don’t go away!

They stay in our bodies and fester. They build up until we blow. They fester as we take increasing measures to avoid them leading to addiction, disconnection and many behaviors intended to just numb out. When we are numb, we can’t experience joy, peace or connection with others.

My 14 year old daughter asked me about feelings just last week. She said,

She is right. We know that avoiding and ignoring our feelings is like shaking a soda bottle. Eventually we take the lid off and the whole thing explodes, but as a society we don’t know what to do about it.

We can acknowledge a feeling simply by naming it, “I feel sad about…” I am really angry at…” and then letting it take its course. Practice self compassion as you let your feelings process. You can journal or talk to a friend. Above all else, I promise you can handle the feelings. The sensations that we tend to avoid are just that… physical sensations. They are uncomfortable and unpleasant but they cannot harm us. If we simply acknowledge our feelings instead of running from them, feelings will process and release.

Many people have years of grief or trauma to work through and this can feel understandably overwhelming. Processing through old trauma without support can trigger anxiety or even be re-traumatizing. Having the support of a therapist while you process emotions can help.

In 2015, Bessel Van Der Kolk, published his now well known book, “The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the healing of Trauma.” In it, Van Der Kolk highlights how our emotions and traumatic memories are stored in our body, physically wreaking havoc on our mental and physical well being. Many researchers have since documented the benefits of yoga, breathwork and meditation as ways of coping with feelings.

It has long been believed in the yoga world that we hold our emotions in our hips. You may have experienced unexpected tears during a yoga session. This is normal. Join me for this week’s yoga practice focused on the hips. Movement on our mats, especially hip opening poses can help us release stored emotions. The most important thing is to acknowledge your feelings instead of running from them and allow yourself to back off if you need to. Be patient and compassionate with yourself.

Try this short and sweet practice called “Letting Go Flow” to begin to release the emotional energy you may be storing.